ABOUT THE POEM: Same thing—larger man, different question, different grief. Like he was running with a dead Sati in his hands, asking the universe, “What is this?” I am running with empty hands, challenging this universe to look me in the eye and stop being unfair. My hands aren’t spread—just clenched. He found and lost; I never found anything at all. Ronie Dinosaur decides to be or not to be, to exist or vanish without a witness, without a mirror. Looking for something he can call his own, as if he is the soul searching for itself. The philosophical question—does the creature exist with no one to witness it?—is the core of the speaker's horror. To be "famous" for being "extinct" is a cruel irony; it means being known only for your absence. “I am in search of beauty. / I am Grief. / I am Ronie Dinosaur.” This triad unites the purpose (beauty), the substance (grief), and the identity (the Dinosaur). It is a complete definition of the self.He ran carrying the corpse of Sati on his shoulder,
asking the sky, “What is this weight? Why me?”
I run with empty fists clenched so tightly the knuckles bleed,
daring the same sky:
“Look me in the eye. Stop whining. Stop cheating. Fight fair.”
My arms are not open in surrender;
they are locked, and always have been-
weapons turned inward.
He found love, burned with it, lost it, and in the quest after the conquest, became truth.
I never even touched the hem of it.
No pyre, no desire, no widow, no witness-just vacuum, no legend.
So Ronie Dinosaur stands at the edge of the question:
to be or not to be.
If no one hears the roar,
if no mirror ever throws the image back,
does the creature still exist
with no one to witness it?
It is just shame upon rejection.
I am looking for one thing-one single thing-to call my own.
Not a woman, not success, not peace.
Just something that belongs to me the way a soul is supposed to belong to a body.
Until then I remain:
extinct while still breathing,
alive while already gone.
That way, I am becoming famous.
I am in search of beauty.
I am Grief.
I am Ronie Dinosaur.
